Rants, raves & the occasional good comment

Is it just me or are these things really weird...

Driving along the roads of JHB, it is most probable that you will come across robots that don't work. Some are just off, which leads to major traffic, accidents and general chaos. We also know taxi's use the robots as suggestions and are optional either way. My question however pertains to the fact that I often see robots flashing red. What exactly does this mean? If the robots can flash red, why not just flash green and orange also. It obviously cannot be a power issue seeing as its flashing red. Where exactly does the problem come in? What possible logical reason could there be for robots only flashing red?

Many of us use the phenomenal service that the Aquazania water company provides. This service includes dropping off random amounts of water each week. No matter how many time you call and them you need x amounts, the chance of it as slim as a bulimic girl after a massive meal and a fresh deposit. It's clear mathematics isn't a specialty of theirs. If you request x bottles of water, chances are you will receive a number between x-5, and x to the power of 30. But moving on... Has anybody ever noticed the "freshly squeezed" label on the water? Maybe people will comment on this and tell me I'm a complete idiot because I've clearly missed the entire advertising objective of it. I figure it has to have a deeper meaning because no person (that I know of at least) could be so intellectually challenged as to think water is "Freshly squeezed." Now although all of the above might be true, every single person I have asked about it, doesn't get it either so clearly something is wrong. Either its an incredibly bad advertising campaign or everybody is stupid. The latter is obviously impossible seeing as I fall into the group of "everybody". Anyway the lucky chap who can decipher the answer to this riddle of sorts will be received a "freshly squeezed" handshake from me. Good luck to you all.

Anybody that has used vending machines or parking ticket machines has at one point or another kicked it and probably cursed it. The strange thing to me is that they are constantly out of change, even though the majority of the money being put into them is indeed change. That aside, another issue of major concern in my life is how these machines can you give change back, but when you try put that exact same coin back into the machine, (to pay for another ticket for example) it refuses to accept it. More stubborn than any person i know (with the possible exception of Luntz) the machine point blank denies the coin came from the machine in the first place and vomits it out every time you try put it in. These scenarios often lead to completely random social scenes where you run around and beg people to exchange R5 coins with you. If extra-terrestrial life does exist it, this is probably the main reason they haven't decided to come live here.